one million words

find your voice. tell your story.

Does your soul have an anchor?

My three year old daughter is obsessed with balloons. If only we could buy a balloon every singly time we went to the store. If only every day was a sugar filled celebration with bright, shiny, floating tokens high above our heads. But life is not a party and we are on a budget. And if you want more sugar, brush […]

when expectations block restoration

God seems to enjoy showing up in unconventional ways. Sometimes he blazes a trail straight through my forest of expectations. When I am in the mood for an adventure this feels kind of fun. Other times I don’t have the energy for something new and would prefer his activity to match the realm of my reality. Then […]

Is God a runner?

Has anyone ever mocked you for running in public? Years ago my parents moved to rural home. Every morning they’d lace up their running shoes and sprint through the country-side while mist rose slowly over the meadows. This type of seemingly aimless physical activity confused the neighbors. Where ya runnin’ to? Got nothin’ else to […]

How people pleasing distorts the Jesus in me

After world war II my german grandparents rented out rooms in their house for extra income. This meant their four boys grew up sleeping in the unfinished attic, spider webs and all. Sometimes it was baking hot and sometimes way chilly. At least a thousand times I have heard my dad say: “When I was […]

thoughts on flying and faith

So yesterday, after a quick flight to Seattle, we take up the middle section of row 33 flying to Frankfurt. It’s the girls second time crossing the Atlantic although they don’t seem to remember the first three years ago. They packed their own carry ons- coloring stuff, sticker books, dolls, blankets, snacks. We have two DVD players which will be […]

when your best is not good enough

Last year I needed a simple denial letter from my primary health insurance for my secondary insurance to cover a claim. I was not expecting to run into problems. A similar request was granted in the past and my premium benefits had not changed on paper. I placed a few phone calls. Weeks went by without obtaining the required letter. More calls. […]

The bravest question ever

“You can’t get to courage without walking through vulnerability.” [Brene Brown] I am a self protection expert, fondly attached to my comfort zone. Life has way of making space for vulnerability though. I resist it, hold tight to the last bit of control. But brave girls, I hear, show up fully and allow themselves to be seen.Brave girls will […]

when God does not speak your love language

Pink blossom branches dance in the breeze outside my window at work. They’ll be gone in a week, maybe two, if it does not rain. I wish they would stay longer. There is a courtyard outside. Women in labor pace in circles, children climb benches. A guy in scrubs practices karate kicks here at lunch time. Sometimes I look far […]

When Jesus assembles your family…

My parents married when I was four. I don’t remember that day. I do remember their baptism shortly after. I sat on my aunts lap in the front row, watched them go under, emerge wet and happy. We’ve got a new life now, they announced. I wanted something new too. I began to pray, each night for a baby sister, […]

EASTER: thoughts on dying, waiting and rising

Our spiritual lives reflect the rhythms of the Easter story, I believe. The passion narrative moves sequentially from dying to waiting to rising. I am most interested in rising. Rising above whatever moment or challenge is in the way of the life I long to live. So I focus on anything resembling life, on my definition of rising. And I forget that before […]